My experience with pregnancy and birth varied greatly from my son to my daughter. I attribute it to the mindset I had going in, as well as how I managed my thoughts as I neared the end. I hate to credit the difference in experiences to a program (Hypnobabies) since I am usually adverse to gimmicks, but in this case it is true.
No one had ever taught me how to relax. No one had ever explained in detail why and how our thoughts impact our body. In this way, the program offered so much more than a way to have a baby comfortably. It helped me to conceptualize the amazing-ness of the mind/body connection. It taught me how to align both so that my body could work as designed.
The main tools that help with alignment are affirmations and meditation. I prefer the word meditation since self-hypnosis is a dirty word to some 😉 Affirmations are a way to re-frame the mind in the moment, and stay focused on the desired outcome(s). They help to hush the negative thoughts that can create anxiety and panic and keep us stressed throughout the day. Meditation helps to wash away the stress that could not be managed in the moment.
The obsessive thoughts triggered by worries, fears and external pressure have been finding their way back into my daily life. It’s been increasingly harder for me to just shrug stuff off. I think a large part of this has to do with me not taking the time to nurture my mind and body. While I no longer have a relevant program to use, I think I have a pretty good handle on the ideas behind the one I used for pregnancy and birth to do it myself.
To get started, I’ve written down some affirmations that I plan to use throughout the day when I find myself feeling pressured…
I trust in my ability to guide these children in a loving, gentle way.
I recognize and release all fear or doubt that might prevent me from responding to my children unconditionally.
I remain aware and in control of my negative feelings, as I do not want to pass them on to my children.
These children are from me, so they can not be stronger than me! <–That one is more comical in nature. 😉
I also have a few mantras that are specific to what I struggle with as a parent. What I have below may or may not resonate with you. I encourage you to reflect on your past and current situation to come up with your own.
My goal as a parent is not to control, but instead to guide.
My children are free to experience what they are going through in their own individual way.
My aim is to nurture my child’s emotional development according to his/her timeline.
My child’s negative feelings are his/her own. I have the power to choose how I react.
I found this particular quote while browsing Facebook the other day. I’m not sure who wrote it, but I like it a lot 🙂 I think it’s an interesting way to look at our job as parents.
“Our job [as parents] is not to raise mild mannered, compliant, sleeping children. Our job is to raise happy, healthy, contributing ADULTS, and it’s a long road to get there.” –anonymous
Do you use affirmations? If so, which ones get you through the day?